17 Oct Thank GOD it’s half term!
As Friday approaches, I finally understand the sighs of ‘Thank god for half term’ from parents, teachers and pupils alike across the country.
I thought it would be easier to have one child at school because, well they’re out all day right?! So that’s one less to worry about?!
I errr, made a mistake.
This first half a term has been a massive shock to the system – its not the school runs, its all the newness to get my head around – the uniform requirements, the reading book system, the sticker system, the school lunch system, the parents facebook group, the PTA stuff, the class reps, the phonics (I still don’t know what a phoneme is), the weekly newsletters, the dates for the diaries, the long-life goods for the Harvest festival, the junk modelling material requests, the drop-in zones, the parents evenings, the homework and weekend projects. Fancy a shape walk this weekend anyone? Nope, me either. The school discos and the bake sales and the quizzes and the gahhhhhhhhhhhhh my head is literally going to explode.
This on top of general life, Evie’s childcare requirements and Mint Rainbow – and not forgetting my normal day job – has left me feeling frazzled. I am so organised but this is kicking my ass! Even if I didn’t work, or had one job (!) this would be blooming hard work. This is an actual email I sent to my husband setting an actual agenda for our evening last week – who said romance was dead haha. I feel this eloquently articulates my point…feel free to skim haha.
Hi babe – things we need to discuss tonight x
- Bonfire Night
- Halloween Plan
- Mint Rainbow – Wealden Times Fair – Wed- Sat (Plan of action for kids)
- Wednesday – Katy to do school drop / Katy driving to paddock wood AM and setting up stand 10:30-12:30 approx. Katy to do Evie and Alfie pickups PM – must leave by 1pm.
- Thursday – Katy & Mum gone at 7am. Mark to drop Alfie with Kate? Alfie school drop- Kate. Alfie school pickup – Kate. Evie at nursey all day – Mark to collect.
- Friday – Katy & Emma gone at 7am. Mark to drop Alfie with Kate? Alfie school drop- Kate. Lyn to have Evie all day and pick up Alfie from school?
- Saturday Katy & Mum TBC gone at 7am. Mark – kids
- Assembly???? When is this?
- Add you to the school Newsletter.
- Next week – drop in zone WEDS
- Phonics workshop THUR – can we do this?
- Speak to parents group about organising an evening one instead
- Lapland UK and Bedgebury – can we cope with them the both same weekend?! Two late nights for kids.
- Re-arrange Bedgebury if req.
- Funding grant for above.
- Plans for Xmas in general.
- Plan for NY (Mum & dads party)
- Date for Xmas shopping – when can I do this??
- Blinds – we need to order some!
- Bed Transfer
- Car – book into garage
- This weeks shipping!
I mean – this was just ONE DAY’s life admin – What the actual F?! Ridiculous.
I so desperately want to be the Mum who is on top of all of this.
I want to do the PTA and I want to be a class rep and I want to do fundraisers and make cakes (or you know, have my Mum make them for me at least haha) but I just cant. I do 8 out of 10 school runs and I feel guilty about the 2 that I can’t do. I feel bad when we don’t do the reading books every day (they are quite boring tbf haha ) and I feel awful when we try to do the homework in a rush whilst I hold Evie off with my foot as she approaches his workbook wielding a glitter pen. I feel bad that everyone in the office starts at 9am and I start at 9:30am so that I can do the school run. I feel bad when I leave the office to rush to the school when my baby shuts his fingers in the fire door (yup, ouch) or when Evie goes to the childminder with a slight temperature because yesterday I missed work due to, well see previous, haha. I feel guilty that we have a cleaner. I feel guilty that I don’t personally sew every single item that goes out the door for Mint Rainbow – which is just plainly ridiculous. I feel bad when the kids eat too much freezer food.
The list is endless and you know what? I’m so over it.
I want to be the stay-at-home Mum AND the working-Mum AND the starting my-own-business Mum. I think everyone does. But we just can’t. And the sooner we accept that the better for everyone’s mental health in my opinion. You CAN do all of these things of course, but there literally is not enough time in the day or space in your head to do everything perfectly, so we must must must accept that its ok to all of the things to the best of your ability.
There is also no point in comparing to other parents – everyone has a different set up, a different set of responsibilities and everyone is trying their absolute best. And you know what, kids don’t compare so neither should we. At the end of the day, they are the ones we’re doing all this stuff for, so what the hell does it matter? If they’re happy, we’re happy right and that’s enough. They literally couldn’t care less if you brought in an organic food hamper or a tin of baked beans for the harvest collection. They don’t care if their name labels are sewn in, or scribbled on in biro. They don’t care if you’re on the PTA or not. They don’t care if they had fish fingers for tea again. They care who got rainbow stickers at school that day. They care what they had for school dinner. They care whether you remembered to get Blu Tac to put up their Ninjago poster. They care about whether there will be party bags at the school disco. And they care that whoever is picking them up from school, brought snacks.
So next half term I am going to try and Be More Kid – aim to get the little things right and hope the big things will take care of themselves. Try to give myself a break from the Mum guilt and remember I’m doing my best. Accept that I can’t do everything and that a happy Mummy equals happy babies.
And hide when they ask for volunteers to help sew Nativity costumes.
Happy half term my loves – have a well-earned rest Mamas! And to those with reception class children – take a minute to breath, take your foot off the pedal, and most importantly just snuggle those babies back home.
x x x